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According to https://positivepsychology.com, “Interpersonal effectiveness, at its most basic, refers to the ability to interact with others.” In a Christian setting, interpersonal effectiveness refers to the ability to interact with others in a way that honours yourself, others and God.
Often, when we are angry, upset or anxious we don’t communicate effectively. We might shout or say unkind things in the heat of the moment. There are many Interpersonal Effectiveness skills that we can learn so that we can do better. The THINK skill encourages us to be empathetic. THINK - Think about the situation from the other person’s point of view. HAVE EMPATHY - Notice how the other person is feeling. INTERPRETATIONS - Try to think of other interpretations for the person’s behaviour. NOTICE - Notice that the other person’s behaviour might be because of their problems. KINDNESS - Respond with kindness. 1 Peter 3:8 says, Finally, all of you should live together in peace. Try to understand each other. Love each other as brothers. Be kind and humble. Next time you're in a sticky situation with someone, use the THINK skill to help you to be kind, compassionate and empathetic and understand the other person's point of view. Matthew 5:43-48 says, You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your friends, hate your enemies.’ But now I tell you: love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may become the children of your Father in heaven. For he makes his sun to shine on bad and good people alike, and gives rain to those who do good and to those who do evil. Why should God reward you if you love only the people who love you? Even the tax collectors do that! And if you speak only to your friends, have you done anything out of the ordinary? Even the pagans do that! You must be perfect—just as your Father in heaven is perfect.
The world says that we should love our friends and hate our enemies, but God’s way is counter-cultural and says we should love our enemies. Jesus says that if we only love our friends, we are no different to the rest of the world. Loving each other, including our enemies is what sets us apart. Let's be honest, loving your enemies is hard. Here are some verses from the Bible that tell us how to do it: PRAY FOR THEM Matthew 5:44 Pray for those who persecute you. DO GOOD TO THEM Luke 6:27 Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you. BLESS THEM Romans 12:14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. The Greek word for bless used here literally means to say good things about them. Hating people doesn't just hurt them, it harms your soul too. So love your enemies - it's good for God, good for them, and good for you. When we're angry or upset with someone, our natural instinct is to grumble and complain about them. The Bible says to bless them and speak well about them instead of cursing them. Ok, this is a big one. Pain is part of life, but if we can learn to accept that we can reduce our suffering. Please note, this does not mean that we endure abuse and violence. |
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