Conflict is an unavoidable part of life. No one is perfect and we all hurt each other because of our brokenness (yes, even you). Often the things you do and say can make the conflict worse. Ignoring it doesn’t work in the long-term either. Here is what the Bible says about conflict resolution.
Listen carefully and don't get angry quickly You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. James 1:17 Use a gentle tone and kind words A gentle answer will calm a person’s anger. But an unkind answer will cause more anger. Proverbs 15:1 Live in peace Do the best you can to live in peace with everyone. Romans 12:18 Put up with each other and forgive others Put up with each other, and forgive anyone who does you wrong, just as Christ has forgiven you. Colossians 3:13 Don't bear grudges Do not be bitter or angry or mad. Never shout angrily or say things to hurt others. Ephesians 4:31 God wants us to forgive others like Christ forgave us. Christ has forgiven us a lot, so surely we can forgive someone who has hurt us. Please note, there are some things that will require professional help to work through such as abuse. A counsellor can be very helpful in working through big hurts. Is there someone you need to forgive? Is there someone you need to ask for forgiveness?
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Ephesians 5:18 says, Don’t get drunk with wine, because it makes you lose control. Instead, keep on being filled with the Spirit. This verse is talking about drunkenness, not just wine. Science backs this up. Here is a list of outcomes from being drunk:
Paul encourages us to be filled with the Spirit instead. I believe this happens by engaging in the Spiritual disciplines - prayer, reading the Bible, fellowship with other believers, worship, fasting, giving, serving, gratitude and confession. What we think, do and say comes from what we are filled with. If we are filled with popular culture, we will think, act and speak like everyone else around us. If we are filled by the Spirit, we will think, act and speak like people who love Jesus. When you are filled with alcohol, it affects your behaviour in a negative way. When you are filled with the Spirit, it affects your behaviour in a positive way.
Ephesians 5:17 says, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. When I was a teenager and young adult I agonised over what God's will for my life was. What subjects did he want me to study at high school? Which university course did he want me to study? Who did he want me to date? Which job should I apply for and take? Which church did he want me to go to? You get the idea.
I eventually learned that it's really quite simple to know the will go God. When Jesus was asked what the most important commandment is in Mark 12:29-31 he said, 'you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength,' and 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' If you fulfil these two commandments, you are doing what God wants. It is my belief that there are any number of subjects, courses, jobs, partners and other optional extras that will be in God's will. The important thing is our that we are loving God and loving others. If you love God, you won't have any idols in your life or use his name as a swear word. If you love others you won't gossip, bully or exclude other people. Here are some more Bible truths about the will of God:
What areas of your life do you think are in God’s will? What areas do you think aren’t in his will? |
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